Grace flows…

experiences personal Worship

In one of my earliest encounters with Sri Bhagavan in erstwhile Satyaloka, I was attending a process in the Mukti Mandap. Bhagavan , in those days used to be sitting in an adjacent room on a rocking chair, physically following up on the progress of the participants.
As the process was underway, a close friend of mine, a doctor who was in a trance suddenly got up and gestured vigorously to me to open my mouth and start singing. I ignored it. Soon, a latter-day senior guide who was a young child then came up to me and said that Bhagavan wanted me to sing. I told him I do not know to sing. Some time elapsed before my friend gestured again; even more vigorously. I again ignored him. During the lunch break, the latter day guide walked up again. I again told him I don’t know to sing. He told me “when Bhagavan is asking you to sing, why don’t you just open your mouth and try?”
Apprehensively, I did so and lo and behold, I started flowing in Telugu, a language I did not know – The Bhajan was Anthani Dayaraa. Since that day, I have been singing and singing…..more often than not, I hear myself singing….. I have absolutely nothing to do with it.
A few years later, the senior guide for Mumbai had told us to put some new Bhajans as a huge programme was happening. A few of us had gathered with our instruments etc.at a local house to try and create some new bhajans. Nothing seemed to be happening until lunch time. Some of us remained in the room while a few walked out to grab a bite.
Those were the days when we were worshipping only the Sapeetha Vastra Srimurti. We knew Amma only as Bhagavan’s wife. Some of us had interacted with her as we volunteered in Satyaloka. I had personally on more than one occasion experienced her Annapoorni form. The food she cooked never seemed to get over as we fed volunteers and process participants.
However, until then, we never worshipped Her.
As we were stuck up in the creation of a new Bhajan, one member of our group who had gone home had a very painful situation at home and was in deep misery. All of us empathized with him but could not do much to help him out. That day was particularly bad for him and on his return to our practice room; he just rested his head on my lap and started sobbing profusely. I was feeling helpless and crying out in prayer.
And as if in answer, the lyrics of a bhajan just flew out of me….Ma Mujhe Vardaan De….It actually came out with the tune. We had absolutely nothing to do with it.
The rest is history. The senior guide came back from the university and told us that she had a surprise for us. We told her we had a surprise for her too. She wanted us to share our surprise first. When we shared what had happened, she went in brought the new Srimurti – the current Sri Amma Bhagavan Srimurti!!!!!!!!
Bhagavan had advised us to start worshipping this form now!!!!Glory be to this Grace powerhouses in our lives.
As this bhajan was so very special, I requested my dear friend, Shankar Mahadevan to sing this song for us….And when we took it to Bhagavan, He was so touched….and extremely happy with Shankar’s rendition so full of feeling….
Each Bhajan is a story, a gift of grace…someday I intend sharing more…
In deepest gratitude….

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